We always try to get better, not be "good enough" | Infinite Devotion Episode 38

What happens to a marriage when both people commit to getting better for each other instead of settling for good enough?

FREE for D/s couples: 7 Tips For A Rock Solid D/s Dynamic
https://infinitedevotion.com/7-tips?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=audio&utm_campaign=ds_ep038&utm_content=notes_top

GO DEEPER: Structuring Your D/s Dynamic, build the structure that makes your deepest desires real
https://infinitedevotion.com/structuring-your-ds-dynamic?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=audio&utm_campaign=ds_ep038&utm_content=notes_top

Early on I put a lot of effort into winning Dawn over, and over time I stopped trying and resigned myself to a low-energy life. I share the conversation with my father around a campfire in April 2015 that made me decide to change, the day I walked into a new CrossFit gym, and how my showing up differently reflected back on Dawn. She talks about the self-hatred and starting and stopping that kept her stuck, and how she has had to let go of an identity around self-discipline that came from old wounding.

In our power exchange Dawn does these things for me, while I hold the space for what is life-giving to her and to us. We are honest about the years when bringing up my body got her punished with my shutting down, and about how a request for more effort used to feel like a threat. We talk about the beauty standard in our contract, why standards only work with a joint commitment to show up as our best for each other, and why a shared growth mindset has made our relationship feel like freedom and acceptance.

If you want standards in your dynamic that feel life-giving instead of threatening, Structuring Your D/s Dynamic shows the two of you how to build agreements and contracts you both want to live up to. Start it here:
https://infinitedevotion.com/structuring-your-ds-dynamic?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=audio&utm_campaign=ds_ep038&utm_content=notes_bridge

MORE FOR YOUR D/s JOURNEY
Devotional D/s, start here: https://infinitedevotion.com/dominance-submission
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D/s coaching with Andrew: https://infinitedevotion.com/ds-coaching
The Infinite Devotion Community: https://infinitedevotion.com/community
All free resources: https://infinitedevotion.com/free-resources

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Andrew Reign's book, Infinite Devotion: How Love and Desire Grow Together for a Lifetime: infinitedevotion.com/book